Friday, July 24, 2009

Hopelessly Lost

We've just finished a wonderful week of learning in the great outdoors through our local Parks program - it was a week of building shelters, exploring the woods, starting fires, toasting marshmallows, hiking in the rain, learning basic survival skills, and playing in the river, of course! The kids had a great time, but as an unfortunate by-product of their wonderful outdoor adventure, they now have much more to tease me about!

I've always been 'directionally challenged', but this week, I got hopelessly lost three days in a row! I am blaming the construction that closed off the most direct route to our daily destination, but really, I have no one to blame but myself - I am hopeless! I even get turned around in large bathrooms sometimes, and I won't tell you how lost I can get in a parking lot!

It used to be that when I got lost, I immediately felt that horrible sick feeling in the pit of my stomach and the sudden urge to use the bathroom. It reminded me of when I was 5 and at an airshow with my parents and their friends. They got to talking and moved forward just a bit to get a better look, and I lost sight of them. Just for a moment, no more, but long enough to feel that panic of uncertainty and pure 5 year old fear.

I'm all over that now - I am so used to getting lost, I've decided just to relax and enjoy the ride! Unless I am under a time constraint, I don't get too bent out of shape - I just laugh, turn around and retrace my route. I am trying not to be too hard on myself anymore - after all, the rest of my glaring faults are quite sufficient to keep me humble! I have an acquaintance whose husband tracks the mileage on their car meticulously - and he questions every unaccounted for mile. I am so blessed that my Historian couldn't care less about the mileage I rack up or fuel I burn finding my way from 'A' to 'B' via 'C' 'D' and sometimes even 'E'. He just smiles and reassures me that I have other strengths! Good thing, or he would be very frustrated with me! He did teach me to read a map properly and that has helped, but I still get lost! Our next vehicle needs one of those talking GPS devices - and I know just what it will say most frequently 'RECALCULATING'!!!

Hopefully, for all of their goofy teasing and hopeful 'are we lost enough that we have to stay in a hotel with a pool Mama?' questions (please be kind and don't ask!), our children are learning something that will help shape their characters in a positive way. Dreamer was born with a map in her head and tries to keep me on track, and so far, the Storyteller seems to know where he is most of the time. Maybe having a directionally challenged Mama will prepare them for their future spouses, or just give them an extra measure of patience - and enrich their prayer lives! Maybe they'll learn to be flexible and just sit back and enjoy the ride ... even if we do see a lot of the same scenery again and again and again as I find my way!

The thing that keeps me trying to find my way out of a paper bag new and exciting places is the assurance that no matter where I am and how lost I find myself, I am never so far that God is not able to locate me. I am never out of His sight or hearing - I can call out to Him any time or place for wisdom (and I do!) and know that He directs my steps and orders my days. I can trust Him completely. What a comfort - especially since I know for sure I cannot trust myself! If I didn't have a faithful God, I might just never bother to leave the house! Think of all that I would miss!

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  1. AnonymousJuly 25, 2009

    Dear Mommy
    Just thought That I would say Hi!
    Love Dreamer

  2. Thats a nice comment from Dreamer, very sweet!!!!


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